Tuesday, March 19, 2024
Sports Jokes

Volleyball Court Jokes Times

Earlier this week, a Microsoft security guard caught two non-Microsoft employees playing volleyball on our campus volleyball court and asked them to leave the premises.

When asked by a fellow employee how he knew that the two were not Microsoft employees, the guard replied: “They had tans.”

Your Cheating Heart Jokes Times

A woman is in bed with her lover who also happens to be her husband’s best friend. They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they’re just laying there, the phone rings.

Since it is the woman’s house, she picks up the receiver. Her lover looks over at her and listens, only hearing her side of the conversation…

(She is speaking in a cheery voice)

“Hello? Oh, hi. I’m so glad that you called. Really? That’s wonderful. I am so happy for you. That sounds terrific. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye bye.”

She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, “Who was that?”

“Oh” she replies, “that was my husband telling me all about the wonderful time he’s having on his fishing trip with you.”

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Tyson Holyfield Fight Jokes Times

“Hey, I just heard you can download the entire Tyson-Holyfield fight from the Internet,” one boxing fan mentioned to another.

“Really?” said the other man. “How much memory does it take up?”

“Very little,” replied the first man. “Just two bytes.”

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Ice Fishing Jokes Times

A young lady who got a fishing rod for her birthday decided to go ice fishing to make good use of her gift.

Early the next morning, she got all her gear together and headed out to the ice. When she reached her final destination, she cut a large hole in the ice and dipped the rod in. Then suddenly she heard a voice that said: “There are no fish in there”. So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, but then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish in there. So she moves again, and the voice tells her there are no fish in there.

So she looks up and sees an irritated man staring down at her. “How do you know there are no fish there?” asks the young girl.

So the man cooly says “Well first of all, this is a hockey rink, and second of all, you’re going to pay for those holes.”

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Where is Harry Jokes Times

A group of friends who went deer hunting separated into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter returned alone, staggering under a hugh buck.

“Where’s Harry?”, asked another hunter.

“He fainted a couple miles up the trail,” Harry’s partner answered. “You left him lying there alone and carried the deer back?”

“It was a tough decision,” said the hunter. “But I figured no one is going to steal Harry.”

You Never Learn Nothin Jokes Times

A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out on the water, the boy suddenly became curious about things in general and started asking all sorts of questions. He asked his father, “Why does the boat float? The father replied, “Don’t rightly know son.”

A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, “How do fish breath underwater?” Once again the father replied, “Don’t rightly know son.” A little later the boy asked his father, “Why is the sky blue?” Again, the father repied. “Don’t rightly know son.”

Finally, the boy asked his father, “Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?” The father replied, “Of course not, if you don’t ask questions, you never learn nothin’.”

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