Saturday, April 27, 2024
Tags Posts tagged with "Fish"

Fish

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10.00 Extra Jokes Times

A lady was in a hardware store looking at a fishing pole. She asked the store manger how much it was. He said “I am blind. Drop it on the ground and I’ll tell you.”

She dropped it on the ground. “Aahh, that’s $10.00.” the store manager said. The lady bent down and let a big fart that everyone can heard. But, she really wanted the pole so she picked it up.And went to pay for it.

“That will be $20.00.” the store manager said.
“But you said $10.00!” the lady pondered.
“$10.00 extra for the stink bait and the duck call.” the store manager replied.

$10.00 Extra Jokes Times

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Recognize Grizzly Bear Jokes Times

The Wisconsin State Dept of Fish and Wildlife is advising hikers, hunters, fishermen and golfers to take extra precautions and be on the alert for bears this summer.

They advise people to wear noise-producing devices such as little bells on their clothing to alert but not startle the bears unexpectedly.

They also advise you to carry pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear.

People should be able to recognize the presence of bears in an area by their droppings:

Black bear droppings are smaller and contain berry residue and possibly squirrel fur.

Grizzly bear droppings have little bells in them and smell like pepper spray.

You Never Learn Nothin Jokes Times

A father and son went fishing one day. While they were out on the water, the boy suddenly became curious about things in general and started asking all sorts of questions. He asked his father, “Why does the boat float? The father replied, “Don’t rightly know son.”

A little later, the boy looked at his father and asked, “How do fish breath underwater?” Once again the father replied, “Don’t rightly know son.” A little later the boy asked his father, “Why is the sky blue?” Again, the father repied. “Don’t rightly know son.”

Finally, the boy asked his father, “Dad, do you mind my asking you all of these questions?” The father replied, “Of course not, if you don’t ask questions, you never learn nothin’.”

Babysitter Jokes Times

A boy was taking care of his baby sister while his parents went to town shopping. He decided to go fishing and he had to take her along.

“I’ll never do that again!” he told his mother that evening. “I didn’t catch a thing!”

“Oh, next time I’m sure she’ll be quiet and not scare the fish away,” his mother said.

The boy said, “It wasn’t that. She ate all the bait.”

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Expensive Fish Jokes Times

Two men go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment – the reels, the rods, the wading suits, the rowboat, the car, and even a cabin in the woods. They spend a fortune!

The first day they go fishing, but they didn’t catch anything. The same thing happens on the second day, and on the third day. It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the man catches a fish.

As they’re driving home they’re really depressed. One guy turns to the other and says, “Do you realise that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred bucks?” The other says, “Wow! Then it’s a good thing we didn’t catch any more!”

Thirsty Snake Jokes Times

Having arrived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realised he had forgotten to bring any bait.

Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm. The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm. Feeling sorry for the little snake with no lunch, he snatched him up again and poured a little beer down his throat and went about his fishing.

An hour or so later the fisherman felt a tug at his pantleg. Looking down, he saw the same snake with three more worms in his mouth…

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